"How does one hang in there with folks, patiently taking from the wreck of a lifetime of internalized shame, a sense that God finds them(us) wholly acceptable?"
Gregory Boyle, Tattoos Of The Heart, p.44
Isn't this the core of our Universalist faith? Carl Rogers called in "unconditional positive regard" and I was taught in my Social Work training to manifest a "nonjudgemental attitude" and "to take the client where they're at."
Boyle's question gets to the crust of the matter as he asks "how does one hang in there with folks?"
The key to being non judgemental is to get into and maintain a "non anxious presence" and how does one lower one's own anxiety and manage one's own fears so they do not get in the way of our relating and empathizing with others?
How does one manage fear and anxiety?
Alcohol, Xanax, Ativan, Sex, Work, Food, Gambling, Marijuana, Prayer, Fellowship, Being of Service, Nature, Solitude, skills of mastery, knowledge, a sense of the transcendent, a warm bath, sleep, cutting, compulsive behaviors, crying, clinging to delusions, singing, other.